The Team 54-80( -4.02u)

1. Bobby 18-23 (+0u)
2. Armen 15-18 (-0.08u)
3. John 7-18 (-1.18u) 👑
4. Jake 14-20 (-2.76u)

Somehow, your premium Bet the Blue and Gray sharps went a disgusting 0-8 on the UConn game. I mean, we probably should have seen that coming. None of us had recent footage of Georgetown-UConn, and the over ended up being a wildly classic trap. Unfortunately, the Hoyas are no more predictable against DePaul. While DePaul has already secured their Big East ranking in the basement, there is little doubt the Blue Demons are still starving for wins anytime they stand a fighting chance. Here’s to praying that this game doesn’t end up anything like that game in Chicago a couple of years ago.  

THE BOARD

Georgetown -1.5

Depaul+1.5

O/U 140

BEST BETS 

Bobby

Georgetown – 1.5

I understand DePaul has a history of stealing games from us, but it’s still DePaul. The only sane way to bet this is the Georgetown spread. Imagine how dumb you would feel to place a losing bet on DePaul. The only possible thing that would make somebody feel like more of an idiot has to be picking DePaul to finish 7th in the Big East. That guy would have to be an absolute clown.  

Jake

Georgetown -1.5 2u

My idol Jon Rothstein has endorsed Martin Mush before he has endorsed me. I am honestly appalled. I poured my heart and soul into that piece, and Mr. Rothstein had nothing to say in return. Maybe I’ll just take a page out of Marty Mush’s book and place a purely subjective and ludicrous bet. Georgetown wins easily today, you heard here first. I stand with the power of Christ, give me the Jesuits over the Blue Demons any day. 

Armen 

Georgetown -1.5 5.5u

Thank you UConn, thank you James Bouknight, thank you RJ Cole, and thank you Daniel Hurley. As much as I hate you all and your program, I would like to thank you for running up the score at the end of Tuesday’s game to both convince the bookmakers that the Hoyas are a bunch of scrubs and hand me the easiest decision of my life. Easier than +14 against Nova, or +7 at Creighton, or even Bucs +140 in the Super Bowl. Georgetown being -1.5 today is quite literally the lock of the century. Now I agree I may toss that phrase around a little too often, but this time I actually mean it. We all know Georgetown sucks, but DePaul sucks at a completely different level. They are the Big East’s version of the New York Jets. This year’s Blue Demons may very well be the worst Big East basketball team I have ever seen. I thought the Hoyas were bad, and they have dominated their mid-major ninth-cousin from Chicago in every statistical category this season. To make matters even worse, I just want to point out the fact that I am riding a bet with the clown below me. So as he does his Louis XVI impression while being dragged to the guillotine, I’m going to hit you with the indisputable numbers and cold hard facts. 

Look at these circumstances and ask yourself if they sound familiar. Allow me to draw a parallel here. A few weeks ago, the Hoyas were getting ready to face a struggling Butler team as point and a half favorites. Four days earlier, Georgetown had snapped a streak of competitive games against a much better Creighton team. Today, the Hoyas get ready to face a struggling DePaul team as point and a half favorites. Four days ago, they snapped a streak of competitive games against a better UConn team. Interesting, right? Oh, and let me remind you about the glorious 78-63 outcome of that very Butler game. Is this a coincidence? Maybe. But do I think there will be a better reason to cash your parents’ 401k after today? Hell no. Do me a favor and go make some money.

John

Georgetown -1.5 6u

I’m rolling with Bobby on this one. Georgetown stinks, but there’s no way I, King John, could look you dead in the eyes and tell you I’m betting on DePaul. No sane man in the history of the universe could do that. KenPom seems to agree with Vegas, labeling the game as a tossup. He’s predicting a Georgetown 70-69 victory and giving Georgetown a slight 51% chance to win, but I’m here to tell you to POUND it. The Hoyas looked pretty dreadful in the first half against UConn and in general left an absurd amount of points at the rim. I’m willing, hell I’m way more than willing, to bet that the Hoyas won’t leave nearly as many points on the board as they did last time. Nutsack Jack FTW. 

*** All bets are completely theoretical and based on delusion.  This column is for entertainment purposes only.